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Youth|Teens
Parents of LGBTQ
Children
"Today I
regret every single second of worry I had back in the
uninformed 80s, wondering how the world was going to
treat my brilliant little boy who loved to twirl. Little
did I know that he was going to kick that old world's
ass to the curb and create a brand new one."
-Deborah
Divine (Mother of Dan Levy, star of Schitt's Creek)
Parenting
gay children can be challenging, rewarding and
ultimately life changing. The level of acceptance of
sexual orientation and gender identity by fathers and
mothers can detract from or expand a child's healthy
growth and development in countless ways. Too many of
our LGBTQ youth face emotional isolation, rejection, and
complete withdrawal from parents that lead many to
depression, drugs and alcohol and even homelessness.
Hearing the words "Mom, Dad, I think I am gay" can be
life changing for many parents. Within an instant of
hearing these words, their preconceived image, dreams
and future expectations of their child are dramatically
reshaped. Parents can choose to be supportive (this is
still the same child they have always loved) and they
can grow with their children as they venture into lives
with LGBTQ relationships.
Real Housewife Heather Dubrow: What I’ve
Learned Raising 3 LGBTQ Kids
Marlon Wayans Reveals His Eldest Child is
Transgender
Annette Benning Shares Heartfelt Tribute
to Her Trans Son Stephen
Marcia Gay Harden and Her Gay Son
Celebs Who Are Out and Proud of Their Trans and
Nonbinary Kids
Things LGBTQ Teens Wish Their Parents Knew
Supporting & Protecting Your LGBTQ Child
Magic Johnson Said His Relationship With
His Son 'Changed Me'
TED Talk: My Family and My Gay Son
Celebrity Parents Who Support Their LGBTQ
Kids
Watching My Son Become My Daughter
Parents' Response is Key to Health of Gay Youth
All too
often, young people look to parents to be their ultimate
support, but, unfortunately, parents cannot overcome the
hurdles of prejudice. Ultimately, many mothers and
fathers distance, alienate and disown their children
because of their sexual orientation or gender identity.
Some young people would choose isolation or death rather
than disclose to their parents, while others feel they
are the only people they can turn to. The level of trust
is immense as a child who has inwardly struggled with
sexual orientation or gender identity decides to confide
in his or her parents.
Clearly, parental responses to a child's gay disclosure
can range along a continuum from complete rejection to
extreme activism. Points on this continuum vary, grow
and evolve as the nature of the relationship and deeper
understandings emerge. Parental alienation can reinforce
self-hatred, isolation and suicidal ideation.
Indeed, parental rejection can be life threatening.
Coming Out to Your Mum
Marcia Gay Harden: How My Three Queer Kids Made Me an
Activist
Celebrities Who Support Their Transgender and Nonbinary
Kids
Annette Bening: I’ve Learned a Lot From Brilliant Trans
Son Stephen
Father's Journey: From Disgust to Pride
How the Mothers of Transgender Children
Are Changing the World
Johns Hopkins: Tips for
Parents of LGBTQ Youth
Info: LGBTQ Youth
Celebrity Parents Supporting Their LGBTQ
Kids
My Two Sons Came Out as Gay
Talking to Your Gay Son About Anti-Gay Violence
Don't Sneak: Father's Advice to Gay Son
Marlon Wayans:
Unconditional Love
Marlon Wayans opens up about being a parent to a
transgender son...
The actor
best known for his comedy, including the series “The
Wayans Bros.” and the 2004 film “White Chicks,” sat down
in Nov 2023 with “The Breakfast Club” to reflect
on his work and family. Opening up about his personal
life, the 51-year-old spoke about being a father to his
son, Kai, who he says was assigned female at birth. Kai
Wayans, who Wayans shares with former wife Angelica
Zachary, was born in 2000. The actor and comedian went
on to explain the need for parents to understand their
child’s transition.
Marlon Wayans Reveals His Eldest Child is
Transgender
Marlon Wayans Opens Up About Being a Parent to a
Transgender Son
Comedian Marlon Wayans Talks About Accepting Trans Son
Marlon Wayans Says He Has Unconditional Love for His
Transgender Son
Comedian Marlon Wayans Expresses Unconditional Love for
His Trans Son
Marlon Wayans says he will speak about supporting his
son’s transition in an upcoming comedy special. "I
talk about my transition as a parent, going from
ignorance and denial to complete unconditional love and
acceptance,” he explained. “I think there’s a lot of
parents out there that need that message, and I know I’m
dealing with it.” Wayans shared his plan to satirize his
experience of coming to terms with his son’s gender
identity in a show named “Rainbow Child.” He explained
that coming to terms with the transition was “a very
painful situation for me. But man, it’s one of the best,
funniest hours (of comedy) I probably could ever
imagine.”
During his
chat, Wayans was even candid about “still working on my
pronouns” when it comes to Kai. “They know I love them,
they see me try, and they’re like, ‘I’m happy.’”
Above all else, Wayans said that he wants his kids to be
free. “I want them to be free in spirit, free in
thought, free to be themselves,” he continued. “The more
you know yourself, the more you can govern yourself. The
more you live your truth, the happier your existence.”
[Source: Alex Portée, NBC News, Today, Nov 2023]
Real Housewife Heather Dubrow: What I’ve
Learned Raising 3 LGBTQ Kids
Cher Talks About Her Trans Son Chaz
Meet the Dragon Dads: The Mormon Fathers Fighting for
Their LGBTQ Kids
Belinda Carlisle and James
Duke Mason: Family and Supporting a Gay Child
Marcia Gay Harden and Her Gay Son
Dwayne Wade's Trans Daughter Makes Red Carpet Debut
Celebs Who Were Fully
Supportive Of Their Kids Coming Out As
LGBTQ
LGBTQ-Friendly Camps and
Summer Programs
Chrysalis Mama: Raising
an LGBTQ Child
Rules for Helping Gay Kids Be Themselves
Jared Polis: Being a Dad, Husband, and
America's first Out Gay Governor
Coming Out to Your Mum
A Lesson for the
Parents of Gay Kids
What
Can Straight Parents Learn From Their LGBTQ Children?
Parents,
regardless of their sexual orientation or gender
identity, often find themselves in a position of
learning from their children. When it comes to straight
parents and their LGBTQ children, this dynamic can be
particularly enriching and transformative.
Firstly, straight parents can learn about authenticity
and self-acceptance from their LGBTQ child. Many LGBTQ
individuals go through a journey of self-discovery and
self-acceptance that involves confronting societal norms
and embracing their true selves. This journey can serve
as a powerful example to straight parents about the
importance of being true to oneself, even in the face of
adversity. By witnessing their child's courage and
authenticity, parents may feel encouraged to reflect on
their own lives and identities, fostering a deeper sense
of self-awareness and acceptance.
Marcia Gay Harden: How My Three Queer Kids Made Me an
Activist
Celebrities Who Support Their Transgender and Nonbinary
Kids
Annette Bening: I’ve Learned a Lot From Brilliant Trans
Son Stephen
Father's Journey: From Disgust to Pride
How the Mothers of Transgender Children
Are Changing the World
Johns Hopkins: Tips for
Parents of LGBTQ Youth
Info: LGBTQ Youth
Celebrity Parents Supporting Their LGBTQ
Kids
My Two Sons Came Out as Gay
Secondly, LGBTQ children often possess a heightened
awareness of diversity and inclusivity. Growing up
navigating diverse identities and experiences, they
develop a sensitivity to the importance of acceptance
and respect for differences. This perspective can be
eye-opening for straight parents who may not have
previously considered issues of diversity and
inclusivity in depth. Learning from their LGBTQ child,
parents can expand their understanding of the world and
cultivate a more inclusive mindset in their own lives
and communities.
Moreover, LGBTQ children frequently challenge
traditional gender roles and norms, offering straight
parents an opportunity to rethink these constructs. By
embracing their gender identity or sexual orientation
authentically, LGBTQ children challenge societal
expectations and stereotypes, inviting their parents to
reconsider and redefine what it means to be a man or a
woman, and what roles are acceptable in relationships
and families.
Additionally, many LGBTQ individuals have faced
discrimination or prejudice, which can foster empathy
and resilience. Straight parents can learn from their
children's experiences of overcoming adversity, gaining
insight into resilience, compassion, and advocacy. This
can inspire parents to become allies in supporting LGBTQ
rights and promoting social justice more broadly.
In essence, what straight parents can learn from their
LGBTQ child extends beyond sexual orientation or gender
identity. It encompasses lessons in authenticity,
inclusivity, diversity, resilience, and empathy. By
embracing these lessons, parents can not only strengthen
their relationships with their children but also
contribute to creating a more accepting and
compassionate society. The journey of learning from
one's child is a profound one, filled with opportunities
for personal growth and mutual understanding.
Real Housewife Heather Dubrow: What I’ve
Learned Raising 3 LGBTQ Kids
Marlon Wayans Reveals His Eldest Child is
Transgender
Annette Benning Shares Heartfelt Tribute
to Her Trans Son Stephen
Marcia Gay Harden and Her Gay Son
Celebs Who Are Out and Proud of Their Trans and
Nonbinary Kids
Supporting and Protecting Your LGBTQ Child
Magic Johnson Said His Relationship With
His Son 'Changed Me'
TED Talk: My Family and My Gay Son
Celebrity Parents Who Support Their LGBTQ
Kids
Parents' Response is Key to Health of Gay Youth
Tips for Parents
Having a
gay child doesn't mean you failed as a parent.
Disowning
your gay child means you failed as a parent.
Engage with your child. Your LGBTQ child requires and
deserves the same level of care, respect, information,
and support as non-LGBTQ children. Ask questions,
listen, empathize, share and just be there for your
child.
Get informed. Get the facts about sexual orientation and
gender identity. Learn new language and the correct
terminology to communicate effectively about sexual
orientation and gender identity. Challenge yourself to
learn and to go beyond stereotyped images of LGBTQ
people.
Marcia Gay Harden and Her Gay Son
Southern Baptist Father's Reaction to Gay Son
Annette Benning Shares Heartfelt Tribute
to Her Trans Son Stephen
Celebrities Who Support Their Transgender and Nonbinary
Kids
Coming Out: Parents Guide to Supporting Your Gay Teen
Dr. Phil Talks With Parent of Bisexual Daughter
How the Mothers of Transgender Children
Are Changing the World
Watching My Son Become My Daughter
Celebs Who Were Fully
Supportive Of Their Kids Coming Out As LGBTQ
TED Talk: My Family and My Gay Son
Info: LGBTQ Youth
Cher Talks About Her Trans Son Chaz
Marcia Gay Harden: How My Three Queer Kids Made Me an
Activist
Get to
know the community. What resources are available? Find
out if there is a Gay/Straight Alliance at school, a
community group for LGBTQ and questioning teens, a
bookstore with a selection of books and magazines on
LGBTQ issues, or a LGBTQ community center nearby.
Explore the Internet. There is a growing amount of
excellent information on-line that connects people with
support and materials on these important topics.
Find out
where your local PFLAG group meets. Many parents say
that their connections with other parents of LGBTQ kids
made a world of difference in their progress toward
understanding their young people. Finding another person
you can trust to share your experience with is
invaluable. Many people have gone through similar things
and their support, lessons learned, and empathy can be
very valuable.
Real Housewife Heather Dubrow: What I’ve
Learned Raising 3 LGBTQ Kids
Coming Out to Your Mum
Rob McElhenney Says Being Raised by Two
Gay Moms is a Gift
Advocate Mag: Tips for Parents of LGBTQ Children
Grandfather of the Year
Info:
LGBTQ Kids
Reaction All Parents Should Have When Their Child Comes
Out
Gay Family
Support
My
Parents Think I'm Gay, But I Am Not
Celebrities Who Have LGBTQ Children
Advocate Mag: Tips for Parents of Gay Kids
Video: Message to Parents From LGBTQ Teens
PFLAG:
Coming Out Books
Don't make it about sex. Just because your child has
come out as LGBTQ does not mean the young person's whole
world revolves around sex or sexual orientation or
gender identity. It will be a big part of who the youth
is, especially during the process of figuring it all
out, including what it means to be LGBTQ. Still, being
LGBTQ isn't the sum of life for your child, and it is
vital to encourage your child in other aspects of life,
such as school, sports, hobbies, friends, and part-time
jobs.
Honor your
child's privacy. Do not "out" him or her to others
without his or her permission. Friends and family
members might have questions or want to know what's up.
But it is most important to be respectful of what your
child wants. Don't betray your child's trust.
Praise your LGBTQ child for coming to you to discuss
this issue. Encourage him or her to continue to confide
in you and keep you "in the know." If your child turns
to you to share personal information, you're must be
doing something right. Your child regards you as
accessible and approachable. You're sending out
consistent verbal and non-verbal cues that say, "Yes,
I'll listen. Please talk to me!" Give yourself some
credit. Your LGBTQ child chose to come out to you.
Congratulations!
Celebrities Who Support Their Transgender and Nonbinary
Kids
Meet the Dragon Dads: The Mormon Fathers Fighting for
Their LGBTQ Kids
Rob McElhenney Says Being Raised by Two
Gay Moms is a Gift
Marlon Wayans Reveals His Eldest Child is
Transgender
Annette Bening: I’ve Learned a Lot From Brilliant Trans
Son Stephen
Dwyane Wade Fears for Trans Daughter Zaya’s Safety Every
Time She Leaves the House
Jennifer Lopez Introduces Her Child Onstage Using
They/Them Pronouns
Magic Johnson on Learning to Accept His
Gay Son: 'He Changed Me'
Find out what kind of support services are in place at
your child's school. Does the school or school district
have a non-discrimination policy? Is a there an LGBTQ
support group? Do you know any "out" people, or their
friends and loved ones, to whom you can turn for
information?
Educate yourself on local, state and national laws and
polices regarding LGBTQ people. On the national level,
LGBTQ people are still second-class citizens in regard
to some national policies and their rights are not
guaranteed by law. Consider educating yourself about
this and finding out what you can do to work toward
extending equal rights to LGBTQ people in the United
States.
My Child
is Gay...What Do I Do Now?
Annette Bening: I’ve Learned a Lot From Brilliant Trans
Son Stephen
Understanding Your Gay Teen
Magic Johnson Said His
Relationship With His Son 'Changed Me'
Celebrity Parents Who
Support Their LGBTQ Kids
Video: Gay Sons and Their Moms
Marcia Gay Harden and Her Gay Son
Belinda
Carlisle and James Duke Mason: Family
and Supporting a Gay Child
Common Fears and How to be Supportive
Celebrities Who Support Their
Transgender and Nonbinary Kids
Cher Talks About Her Trans Son Chaz
Info:
LGBTQ Kids
Father's Journey: From Disgust to Pride
Rules for Helping Gay Kids Be Themselves
Gay Family
Support
My
Parents Think I'm Gay, But I Am Not
Celebrities Who Have LGBTQ Children
Coming Out to Your Mum
Annette Benning Shares Heartfelt Tribute
to Her Trans Son Stephen
Dwayne Wade's Trans Daughter Makes Red Carpet Debut
Advocate Mag: Tips for Parents of LGBTQ Children
Jaden
Smith
Will and
Jada Pinkett Smith are known for their outstanding
acting and music careers, but they’re also recognized
for having one of the most hands-off, laid-back
parenting styles for their kids, Jaden and Willow. Will
speaks openly about his approach to parenting and the
way he and his wife Jada consciously encourage their
kids' freedom of expression.
Many
movie-goers may remember that Will and Jaden were the
father and son team in "Pursuit of Happyness." That
adorable little boy is all grown up now. He turned 21 in
2019.
Jaden’s gender-fluid style has been the subject of
public discussion as he started wearing dresses when he
was 17 years old and was named the new face of Louis
Vuitton’s womenswear campaign. “You know, there’s a
really powerful internal quality as an artist that as
parents we encourage,” Smith said. “You gotta get out on
the edge, you have to try things, you have to be
comfortable doing things that people don’t agree with
and you have to be comfortable doing things that you
could fail.” Will added, “Jaden is 100 percent fearless,
he will do anything. So as a parent it’s scary, it’s
really terrifying, but he is completely willing to live
and die by his own artistic decisions and he just
doesn’t concern himself with what people think.”
Will Smith: Parent of Gender Fluid Son
Jaden Smith Opens Up About Being Gender Fluid
Father and Son: Will and Jaden on Ellen Show
Willow Smith Praises Brother Jaden for Challenging
Gender Stereotypes
Will and Jaden: Pursuit of Happyness
Jaden Smith: Adventures in Gender Fluidity
Home Movies: Jaden Turns 21
The “Fresh Prince” star opened up about what it was like
for he an Jada to raise teenagers. “Because we’re both
artists, we decided a long time ago that it’s sort of
better to flow with what people are naturally more than
what our egos need them to be,” Smith said. “So we
really just try to find the things that they’re good at
and support those things rather than forcing them.“ It
seems the “flow” strategy (and famous lack of
punishment) in the house is working out for Willow and
Jaden.
Real Housewife Heather Dubrow: What I’ve
Learned Raising 3 LGBTQ Kids
Video: Gay Sons and Their Moms
Common Fears and How to be Supportive
Jared Polis: Being a Dad, Husband, and
America's first Out Gay Governor
Celebs Who Were Fully
Supportive Of Their Kids Coming Out As LGBTQ
Info:
LGBTQ Kids
Marcia Gay Harden: How My Three Queer Kids Made Me an
Activist
My Child
is Gay...What Do I Do Now?
Understanding Your Gay Teen
Coming Out to Your Mum
Celebrity Parents of LGBTQ Kids
Having a
child who is different can be hard to handle for a
parent. But when these celebrities found out their kids
are members of the LGBTQ community, they not only
accepted them with open arms, they have also been
publicly supportive in the most inspiring way.
Alec
Baldwin
Johnny Depp/Vanessa Paradis
Cher
Mia Farrow
Dwyane Wade/Gabrielle Union
Sally Field
Barbra Streisand
Marlon Wayans
Billy Ray/Tish Cyrus
Beyonce/Jay Z
|
Angelina Jolie/Brad Pitt
Sharon Osbourne
Gloria Estefan
Sia
Marcia Gay Harden
Will
Smith/Jada Pinkett Smith
Gloria Vanderbilt
Warren Beatty/Annette Bening
Marie Osmond
Jennifer
Lopez/Marc Anthony
|
LGBTQ-Friendly Camps and Summer Programs
92 Year Old Mother of Lesbian Daughters Attends NYC
Pride for 30 Years
Sally Field Receives HRC Ally Award and Talks About Gay
Son
Chrysalis Mama: Raising an LGBTQ Child
Info:
LGBTQ Kids
Marcia Gay Harden: How My Three Queer Kids Made Me an
Activist
Things LGBTQ Teens Wish Their Parents Knew
Celebrities Who Have LGBTQ Children
Dwayne Wade's Trans Daughter Makes Red Carpet Debut
Johns Hopkins: Tips for
Parents of LGBTQ Youth
Info: LGBTQ Siblings
Celebrity Parents Who Support Their LGBTQ
Kids
Cynthia Nixon
Charlize Theron
Belinda Carlisle
Isiah Thomas
Vanna
White
Eugene
Levy/Deborah Divine
Busy Phillips
Reese
Witherspoon
|
Cybill Shepherd
Ally Sheedy
Earvin Johnson Jr/Cookie Johnson
Anne Rice
Dean McDermott
Sade
Khary Payton
|
Celebs Who Were Fully
Supportive Of Their Kids Coming Out As LGBTQ
Belinda Carlisle and James
Duke Mason: Family and Supporting a Gay Child
Celebrities Who Have LGBTQ Children
Dwayne Wade's Trans Daughter Makes Red Carpet Debut
Advocate Mag: Tips for Parents of LGBTQ Children
Marcia Gay Harden and Her Gay Son
Celebrity Parents Who Support Their LGBTQ
Kids
Annette Benning Shares Heartfelt Tribute
to Her Trans Son Stephen
Advocate Mag: Tips for Parents of LGBTQ Children
Resources for Parents
This Is a
Book for Parents of Gay Kids: A Question & Answer Guide
to Everyday Life by Dannielle Owens-Reid & Kristin
Russo
Is It a Choice?: Answers to 300 of the Most Frequently
Asked Questions About Gay and Lesbian People by Eric
Marcus
Always My Child: Parent’s Guide to Understanding Your
Gay Lesbian Bisexual Transgender or Questioning
Son or Daughter by Kevin Jennings
Out of the Closet, Into Our Hearts by Laura Siegel &
Nancy Lamkin Olson
Beyond Acceptance: Parents of Lesbians and Gays Talk
About Their Experiences by
Carolyn Welch Griffen
Now That
You Know: A Parents’ Guide to Understanding Their Gay &
Lesbian Children by Betty Fairchild & Nancy
Hayward
Coming Out, Coming Home: Helping Families Adjust to a
Lesbian or Gay Child by Michael C. LaSala
Side by
Side: On Having a Gay or Lesbian Sibling by Andrew R.
Gottlieb
Love, Ellen: A Mother/Daughter Journey by Betty
Degeneres
My Child Is Gay: How Parents React When They Hear the
News by Bryce McDougall
Something to Tell You by Gilbert Herdt and Bruce Koff
Straight Parents, Gay Children: Keeping Families
Together by Robert A. Bernstein, Robert MacNeil &
Betty DeGeneres
Helping Your Transgender Teen: A Guide for Parents by
Irwin Krieger
Different Daughters: A Book by Mothers of Lesbians by
Louise Rafkin
My Son Eric: A Mother Struggles to Accept Her Gay Son
and Discovers Herself by Mary V. Borhek & Christine M.
Smith
Finding Out: The ABC’s of Same Sex Relationships by
Homer and Sue Spencer
The Family Heart: A Memoir of When Our Son Came Out by
Robb Forman Dew
Prayers for Bobby: A Mother’s Coming to Terms With the
Suicide of Her Gay Son by Leroy Aarons
Real Housewife Heather Dubrow: What I’ve
Learned Raising 3 LGBTQ Kids
LGBTQ-Friendly Camps and Summer Programs
Out Smart Mag: Parents of Gay Kids
PFLAG NYC Book List
Annette Bening: I’ve Learned a Lot From Brilliant Trans
Son Stephen
Chrysalis Mama: Raising an LGBTQ Child
Father's Journey: From Disgust to Pride
Celebs Who Were Fully
Supportive Of Their Kids Coming Out As LGBTQ
Advocate Mag: Tips for Parents of LGBTQ Children
Book Riot: Books for Parents of LGBTQ Kids
Dwayne Wade's Trans Daughter Makes Red Carpet Debut
How the Mothers of Transgender Children
Are Changing the World
Watching My Son Become My Daughter
My Kid is
Gay: List of Resources for Parents
TED Talk: My Family and My Gay Son
Magic Johnson Said His Relationship With
His Son 'Changed Me'
Marcia Gay Harden and Her Gay Son
Info: LGBTQ Siblings
List of
Books for Parents of Sexual Minority Youth
Advocates for LGBTQ Youth: Tips for Parents
Celebrity Parents Who Support Their LGBTQ
Kids
Johns Hopkins: Tips for Parents of LGBTQ Youth
Celebrities Who Support Their Transgender and Nonbinary
Kids
CDC: Resources for LGBTQ Youth
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