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PHYSICAL/BIOLOGICAL
 

Why Do People Have Sex?

What Gay Men Really Do in Bed

How Do Lesbians Have Sex?

Ultimate Ranking of Common Sex Positions

Most Popular Sex Positions

Preferred Positions

 

Defining Sex

 

Sex refers to biological or physical activity of an erotic, sensual, or carnal nature, including specifically sexual intercourse. It is a physical act engaged in generally for the purpose of love, pleasure, or reproduction.

 

From pleasure to procreation, and everything in between, today's reasons for taking a roll in the hay seem to vary as much as the terms for the deed itself. A 2010 Sexuality & Culture review of sex motivation studies states that people are offering "far more reasons for choosing to engage in sexual activity than in former times." And we're doing it more often too. It’s a stark contrast from historical assumptions, which cited only three sexual motive: To make babies, to feel good, or because you're in love.

 



Today, sexual behaviors seem to have taken on many different psychological, social, cultural, even religious meanings. Yet, some sexologists say, at the most basic level, there is only one true reason people seek sex.  We are "wired" for sex.  "We are programmed to do so," sex therapist Richard A. Carroll, associate Northwestern University psychiatry and behavioral sciences professor says. "Asking why people have sex is akin to asking why we eat. Our brains are designed to motivate us toward that behavior."
 

Why Do People Have Sex?

Web MD: Reasons People Have Sex

Psychology Today: Reasons People Have Sex

CNN Lisa Ling: This is Sex

Strangers Kissing Each Other for the First Time

Ultimate Ranking of Common Sex Positions

Most Popular Sex Positions

Myths and Lies About Sex

Info: Safe Sex

 

Sexual Activity

 

Sexual activity is described in our society by a variety of terms, including intercourse, lovemaking, mating, copulation, and coitus.

 

Informally, sex has been referred to as making love, making whoopee, getting laid, getting lucky, nooky, bonking, boinking, boffing, banging, humping, shagging, screwing, fucking, hooking up, and a roll in the hay.

 

It has also been referred to as fornication, carnal knowledge, making babies, the facts of life, the birds and the bees, putting out, and going all the way. 

 

Quite often sexual activity is described in polite or ambiguous terms such as "going to bed with" or "sleeping with."

 

 

Regarding sexual activity and the foreplay leading up to it, the baseball analogy has been in usage for a long time:

 

First base – kissing

Second base – touching, heavy petting, rubbing

Third base – oral sex

Home run – intercourse

 

What qualifies as sex?  What acts are considered to be sex?  The Urban Dictionary suggests that if a person has an orgasm (ejaculation) in your presence with your permission, consent, or active participation, you just had sex.

 

We typically think of sex as any consensual insertion of one body part into another body part or orafice, as in the insertion of a penis or finger into a vagina, mouth, or anus.

 

Sex can also be described as any consensual interaction of one body part with another body part or orafice, usually involving caressing, rubbing, stroking, or fondling.   

 

Sex, broadly defined, includes vaginal, oral, anal, or manual forms.

 

Most Popular Sex Positions

Preferred Positions

What Gay Men Really Do in Bed

How Do Lesbians Have Sex?

Info: Safe Sex

Ultimate Ranking of Common Sex Positions

Scarleteen: Sex Ed For The Real World

 

Having Sex

 

People who identify as lesbian, gay, bi or heterosexual can give and express pleasure in many ways. There isn’t just one way for two people to have sex, no matter what sex or sexual orientation they are.

 

What two people of the same sex do to have sex together depends on what feels good for them. Often, people think that sex is only putting a penis into a vagina, but that may not be the activity that brings the most pleasure to the two people. This is true for heterosexual, bisexual, lesbian and gay people.

 

 

Males who identify as gay, bisexual or just do sexual things with other males may use their fingers (manual stimulation), mouths (oral sex) and various body parts to give and receive pleasure. They may kiss, touch each other’s bodies or touch the penis and other areas including the scrotum or the anus. Sometimes they use penises to penetrate the anal opening (anal sex).

 

Females who identify as lesbian, bisexual or just do sexual things with other females may touch each other’s genitals by using their fingers (manual stimulation), mouths (oral sex) and various body parts. They may kiss, touch each other’s breasts or touch the clitoris and other areas of the vagina or the anus. Sometimes they use their fingers to penetrate the vaginal opening or to penetrate the anal opening (anal sex). Some also rub their vulvas together (tribbing).

 

 

It is possible to transmit sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) through many of these practices, so it is important for people who have partners of the same sex to read up on safer sex. It is important to use a condom for oral sex performed on a male and for anal sex, and to use a dental dam or a condom that is cut length-wise to create a sheet of latex to use as a barrier when performing oral-anal stimulation or oral sex on a female.

 

When two people can communicate well, they can experience a wide range of sexual activities that are mutually agreed on, pleasurable and creative. This is true whether they are heterosexual, bisexual, lesbian or gay.

 

[Source: Scatrleteen]

 

Why Do People Have Sex?

Web MD: Reasons People Have Sex

Myths and Lies About Sex

Info: Safe Sex

Psychology Today: Reasons People Have Sex

Ultimate Ranking of Common Sex Positions

Most Popular Sex Positions

 

 

How Do Lesbians Have Sex?

 

How do Lesbians have sex? The same way anyone else does. Which is to say, any vast number of different ways.

 

Sex isn't just heterosexual intercourse. Sex is any number of combination of things people of all stripes do together to seek mutual sexual pleasure, and what those things or that combination are varies for everyone, even from day to day.

 

So, on a given day, Lesbian Couple A may want to engage in some mutual masturbation and some oral sex, while Lesbian Couple B may choose to engage in shared manual sex and genital massage mixed in with some role play, and Lesbian Couple C may decide to do some big-time snuggling paired with strap-on play.

 

 

There's really nothing heterosexual couples can do that lesbian couples cannot. Even vaginal intercourse isn't exclusive to heterosexuals, when it's something lesbian women want, as it can be done either with hands or with sex toys. That said, intercourse usually isn't seen as "the" sex the way it can be in many male-female partnerships, given that a majority of women don't find intercourse all by itself that satisfying, but plenty of hetero couples have, by now, clued into the fact that intercourse shouldn't be the main thing on the menu, too. All the things most people think of as sex (making out, frottage, manual sex, mutual masturbation, oral sex, vaginal intercourse, anal sex), lesbians can also do it.

 

Figuring out what it is exactly we do with any given partner isn't some script we follow, or determined based on what sets of chromosomes or genitals are in the mix, it's about exploring our unique sexuality and theirs, communicating, experimenting, and varying what we do, and how we do it, based on mutual wants, needs and preferences.

 

[Source: Heather Corinna, Scarleteen]

 

What Gay Men Really Do in Bed

How Do Lesbians Have Sex?

Ultimate Ranking of Common Sex Positions

CNN Lisa Ling: This is Sex

Most Popular Sex Positions

Preferred Positions

Info: Safe Sex

Scarleteen: Glossary of Sexual Terms

 

 

Gay Men Having Sex

 

Despite the popular perception, sexual behaviors involving the anus were least common among gay men, researchers found. Around 75 percent of participants reported kissing their partners, giving oral sex, and/or receiving oral sex in their most recent sexual encounters. By contrast, only 36 percent of men reporting receiving anal sex and 34 percent of men reporting giving it. Half of participants who engaged in anal sex employed a condom. The most common series of activities in the encounter (reported by 16 percent of men) involved holding their partner romantically, kissing partner on mouth, solo masturbation, masturbating partner, masturbation by partner, and genital–genital contact.

 

[Source: Amanda Hess, Good Worldwide, October 2011]

 

Why Do People Have Sex?

Web MD: Reasons People Have Sex

Psychology Today: Reasons People Have Sex

Ultimate Ranking of Common Sex Positions

Most Popular Sex Positions

Let's Talk About Anal Sex

Info: Safe Sex

 

 

Lesbian Sex

 

Question: “How do lesbians have sex?”  Of the many responses the Yahoo Answers webpage received for such a question, the following answer was voted The Best: “Honestly, I don’t know how two women can do anything that qualifies as sex. Two guys can have anal, but two women don’t have much to work with.”

 

Now I could follow the twisted, homophobic “logic” that “gay people can’t have real sex” because there’s no penis and vagina pairing. But why is it that so many people have no problem wrapping their heads around gay male sex but can’t even begin to contemplate what sex might look like between two women? I know that social norms and the sad closeting of clitoral-focused female pleasure has led us all to believe that your North Pole is truly the center of everyone’s sexual gravity, but the world of sex doesn’t actually revolve around your penis. Sorry.

 

 

However, if you asked a U-Haul full of lesbians what lesbian sex is, they’d probably be hard pressed to agree on the same answer. But just because we don’t have a formulaic Tab A to insert into Slot B doesn’t mean we can’t have real sex. In fact, existing outside this formula often makes lesbian sex more dynamic, creative and orgasmic exactly because it does not revolve around one particular penile axis.

 

So what is lesbian sex?

 

Digital: Penetration or even just some well-placed rubbing with fingers and hands. A couple of dainty extremities seem puny in the shadow of your Eiffel Tower? How about three? Or four? Or, hell, even a whole fist? What if you treated digital penetration as your sexual entree instead of a quick appetizer? It’s truly amazing, the number of ways we ladies can score another lady’s digits (And I don’t just mean scribbled on a bar napkin).

 

Oral: Cunnilingus. Many seem to think that diving for muff is a woman’s favorite thing to do when confronted with a vagina. It’s simply not the case for all. Just like all straight people don’t love missionary style (right?), not all lesbians like oral sex. However, the fact that oral doesn’t (always) include penetration doesn’t mean it isn’t considered sex by many.

 

 

Vaginal or Anal Penetrative with a Dildo or Vibrator: The dildo may or may not be strapped on with a harness. This is where the holes in the “no sex without my penis” argument really expand (puns always intended). A dildo looks like a penis, is strapped onto the same place an anatomical penis would go, goes into the same opening as a penis and can feel a lot like a flesh-and-blood penis, too. Since it comes in all different sizes, shapes and colors, I’d say we actually have lots to work with.

 

Frottage: This is grinding or scissoring or any fancy word you want to use for rubbing up against each other.

 

[Source: Yana Tallon-Hicks, Valley Advocate, November 2012]

 

Ultimate Ranking of Common Sex Positions

Info: Safe Sex

Most Popular Sex Positions

Scarleteen: Sex Ed For The Real World

Preferred Positions

Myths and Lies About Sex

What Gay Men Really Do in Bed

How Do Lesbians Have Sex?

Scarleteen: Glossary of Sexual Terms

 

Sex Terms

 

Insertive Partner - A sexual partner who is inserting a part of their bodies into a partner's body in some way.

 

Receptive Partner - A sexual partner who is having something done to them, or who is taking a part of a partner's body or a sex toy into their bodies.

 

Intercourse - When people interlock their genitals and move together as feels good to them for the purpose of sexual stimulation and/or reproduction.

 

 

Vaginal Intercourse - When a penis or sex toy is inserted into and held by the vagina while partners move their bodies as feels good to them for the purpose of sexual stimulation and/or reproduction.

 

Introitus - The entrance into a canal or hollow organ, such as the vagina. "Vaginal introitus" is another term for the vaginal opening.

 

Dry Sex - A kind of sex where people have clothes on, but are pressing their genitals together. This can also be called frottage, grinding, or dry humping.

 

Frottage - Rubbing against the body of another person (usually with clothes on) to express sexual feelings or seek out sexual pleasure. "Dry humping" is a form of frottage.

 

Tribadism - Rubbing one's genitals against another person's genitals directly, usually without clothing, to express sexual feelings and seek out sexual pleasure. Used most often in the context of lesbian sex. "Tribbing" is another term for tribadism.

 

Scissoring - Lesbian sex act where two partners interlock their spread legs (like two pairs of scissors) and rub their vulvae together to stimulate each other's clitoris. A type of tribadism, the practice has many colloquialisms, including making tortillas, polishing mirrors, twisted sisters, and muff buffing).

 

Petting - Affectionate or sexual stroking and touching. Petting historically has also meant any kind of sexually activity besides intercourse. When it includes kinds of direct genital stimulation, it's sometimes called "heavy petting."

 

Making Out - A vague term, but often a session of extended activity that includes passionate or deep kissing, some kind of other body contact and may even include other kinds of sex, like manual sex (fingering or handjobs).

 

 

Mutual Masturbation - When sexual partners masturbate together. Sometimes people also use "mutual masturbation" to mean manual sex (fingering or handjobs) done at the same time.

 

Oral Sex - Use of the mouth, lips or tongue for sexual stimulation to the clitoris or penis.

 

Cunnilingus - Type of oral sex.  Use of the mouth, lips or tongue for sexual stimulation to the clitoris. Sometimes referred to as "going down on" someone.

 

Fellatio - Type of oral sex.  Use of the mouth, lips or tongue for sexual stimulation to the penis. Sometimes referred to as a "blowjob".

 

Analingus - Use of the mouth, lips or tongue for sexual stimulation to the anus. Sometimes referred to as "rimming."

 

Anal Sex - Sexual activity involving penetration of the anus.

 

Video: Being Healthy Sexual

Healthy Sexual is New Term for Safe Sex

American Sexual Health Association

CNN Lisa Ling: This is Sex

Healthy Sexuality

Info: Safe Sex

Intimate Relationship

Healthy Sexual Tumblr Page

YouTube Channel: Healthy Sexual

 

 

Healthy Sexual

 

The term "safe sex" is being replaced by "healthysexual." There is a new campaign that is seeking to change the way we talk about sex.

 

To anyone who grew up with the language of 1980s and 1990s public service announcements, the term “safe sex” won’t raise any concerns. At the time, posters, TV advertisements, and radio spots tackled, with conservative frankness, the rampant and deadly spread of HIV. “Safe sex”, modern critics now believe, suggested that many sexual activities, specifically non-heteronormative ones, were unsafe by definition. This heightened stigma around the sexual acts of queer people.

 

The new “Healthysexual” campaign, launched in 2016, says the term “safe sex” has outlived its use, and that it further perpetuates fearing and judging people based on their chosen sexual activities. While the concept of “safety” is, correctly, bound to pregnancy prevention, condom usage, and HIV/AIDS awareness, this new positive and upbeat campaign puts the focus on how following those guidelines makes a person more or less healthy, not more or less safe.

 

 

Common Sexual Terms

 

Sex is a topic that is quite popular to talk about among friends, whether in a funny, sarcastic way, or in serious conversation when talking about one’s relationship.  Learning about idioms and slang for sexual terms helps your understanding of sex as an everyday topic that often comes up in popular culture, and media.  More often than not, we use sexual innuendos (suggestive terms) rather than the more literal terms that you might already know.

  

--Have Sex - Most common, formal, and appropriate term to use

--Make Love – Polite, common term, but is usually used when you are in a relationship (that is, to have sex with a girlfriend/boyfriend or wife/husband)

--Sleep Together (Go to Bed) – Polite, appropriate and ambiguous but doesn’t necessarily mean that two people have sex, but most people will assume that if you say you slept with someone there wasn’t actually much sleeping

--Coitus – Formal term, sounds technical or clinical

--Copulation – Formal term, sounds technical or clinical

--Fornicate - Sounds biblical and judgmental, sometimes used comically

 

[Source: Real Life Global]

 

Why Do People Have Sex?

Web MD: Reasons People Have Sex

Psychology Today: Reasons People Have Sex

Strangers Kissing Each Other for the First Time

Ultimate Ranking of Common Sex Positions

Most Popular Sex Positions

Let's Talk About Anal Sex

 

Variety of Sexual Activity

 

There are many ways that everyone (lesbian, gay, bisexual, heterosexual) can have sex with a partner, including kissing, masturbation, erotic massage, body rubbing, fantasy, and using sex toys for clitoral, anal, or vaginal stimulation. Many people also enjoy oral sex, which is when someone uses her or his mouth to stimulate a partner’s genitals.

 

Everyone is different when it comes to what they enjoy sexually. People have various likes and dislikes and only you will know what feels good for you.

 

 

Women don’t need to worry about getting pregnant when they have sex with other women, but they do need to protect themselves against sexually transmitted infections. While transmission rates are lower for women who have sex with women, it’s still possible for lesbians to acquire and transmit infections.

 

Women can reduce the risk of infection the same way straight people can (through safer sex, including lower-risk behaviors and the use of latex barriers) like using dental dams for oral sex, and condoms on sex toys.

 

What Gay Men Really Do in Bed

How Do Lesbians Have Sex?

Myths and Lies About Sex

Ultimate Ranking of Common Sex Positions

Most Popular Sex Positions

Scarleteen: Sex Ed For The Real World

Why Do People Have Sex?

 

Favorite Sex Positions

 

Online doctor site Dr. Ed surveyed 2,000 people in Europe and the US on their favorite sex positions, and which ones they want to try the most.

 

Overall, more than a third said doggy style was their favorite. Missionary came in second at 23 percent, followed by cowgirl at 19 per cent. The sixty-nine position came in at 4 percent, and spooning came in just behind it. Also in the top ten were anal, oral and “tabletop”. 

 

 

And when it comes to geography, there are some differences in people’s favorite positions. Doggy style came in at number one in the UK, US, Germany, Romania, Spain, France and Austria. The Polish prefer spooning, the Netherlands prefers missionary, while Belgium, Switzerland and Italy like the cowgirl position the best.

 

When it comes to the positions people want to try, tabletop came in at number one, followed by sixty-nine, kneeling wheelbarrow and anal.

 

[Source: Indy 100, Jan 2017]

 

 

Sexual Positions Described

 

--Missionary – Lying Down, Face-to-Face, One Person on Top of Other Person

--Saddling – Legs Wrapped Around Torso, Sitting Face to Face

--Scissors - Open-Legged, Genital-to-Genital

--Doggy Style – One Person on All Fours, Other Person From Behind

--Cowgirl/Cowboy - Boy Lying Down, Girl (or Boy) Sitting on Top, Facing Toward

--Reverse Cowgirl/Cowboy - Boy Lying Down, Girl (or Boy) Sitting on Top, Facing Away

--Table/Bed as Prop - One Person on Bed or Table While Other Person is Standing

--Sixty Nine - Oral Sex Yin Yang Style

--Spooning – Nestling, From Behind, Facing Same Direction, Side by Side, Knees Drawn Up

 

[Source: BuzzFeed]

 



Variety of Sexual Positions

 

While we're all unique sexual beings, there's one thing most of us apparently just can't get enough of.  And that would be doggy style.

 

According to a survey of 2,000 people from the US and the UK,  more than 35 percent of people said that doggy style (intercourse from the rear position) was their preferred go-to position followed by missionary (face to face) and cowgirl (girl on top).

 

Though both men and women agreed that doggy style is the best, women's second favorite sex move was missionary. For dudes, the number-two slot was taken by the cowgirl position.

 

Men were also more likely to say they wanted to try anal sex. They ranked it as the second position guys wanted to try, right behind sixty-nine (69). However, backdoor action (anal sex) didn't even make the list of top 10 positions women wanted to try.

 

But it's not like the women surveyed weren't into adventurous sex experiences. At the top of ladies to-do list: tabletop (also known as sex on a table), kneeling wheelbarrow, and sixty-nine (69).

 

[Source: Women's Health]

 

 

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